Anyway
There's been a lot of comparison as to how I AM like certain Disney princesses, and I want to make something clear. I'm not like every bratty princess out there. In fact, I'm pretty much only like the two I mentioned. And, to prove my point I shall go on to provide 7 ways that I am nothing like the Disney princess Ariel.However, I'll tell you I could come up with a myriad more reasons we're nothin' alike. I'm merely sticking to seven for the purpose of the countdown...
Anywhoes
1! Ariel thinks she can sing.
I, on the other hand, know that I cannot sing. I do not claim otherwise, in the least. In fact, I would be the bird they're putting out of it's misery.
2! Ariel wears bikini's
Actually... that's not even a bikini, that's a couple of seashells... I do not have a bikini body, nor would I wear underpants as a bathing suit if I did. Don't get me wrong, I don't exactly spill out on the beach in late 19th century bathing suit get-up. But I try to have a sense of modesty.
3! Ariel can swim.
My entire life I've not been a very good swimmer. However, in recent year I have shown some improvement. I've learned how to tread water.
4! Ariel is a whiny little brat.
Yeah, I know I have my moments. But seriously, I'm not that bad...
5! Ariel is tiny!
I'm a Barbra-Jean type. I could crush her with one swing of my hips. Pretty much no exaggeration.
6! She lacks common sense.
(In my notes for this post I used the word "stupid" however, I decided to use a nicer word... ) Anyway, did she really think that that witch octopus lady was going to give her what she wanted? In a nice way? I mean, frsrsly, what a fool!
7! She is a mermaid.
Probably the most obvious. However, it's very very true. I do not have the body of a fish.
To those of you who love Ariel, and aren't partial to my "dissing" her in any way. I am sorry for you.
However, smiles and hugs and kisses and puppy-dog tails and unicorns and rainbows and butterflies and all things sickeningly happy.
The End.
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